Life lessons

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TJP
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Life lessons

Postby TJP » Wed May 16, 2012 5:18 pm

Hi, im new to this forum and im hoping someone maybe able to help me with some guidence.

Just recently i put my heart back out there and got it well and truly broken, most likely through my own negativity but it was such a wonderful feeling that i would like to feel it again. I have tried to put it all behind me and put myself back out there but it all seems to go pear shaped very easy. I guess i would like to know if i am ever going to learn the lessons of previous relationships and be able to find that wonderful feeling again.

Thanks for taking the time to read :)

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Re: Life lessons

Postby Truthseeker » Wed May 16, 2012 7:59 pm

The best thing you could do for yourself now that you are alone is to work on yourself. Ask yourself "where did I go wrong?" and work on those behaviours/patterns that are holding you back from giving out your very best. If for example you have a tendency to get angry easily (this is just an example) then work on how you can control that bad temper so that you don't carry that negative aspect with you onto the next relationship.

I feel that if you work on yourself now then you will be able to give yourself more positively to the new person that comes along. And don't compare all the people that you have been with in the past to each other, each person is unique and different in there own special way, don't think they are all going to be the same, you attract what you give out. If you want a happy person then be that happy person yourself.

Good luck O:-)

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Re: Life lessons

Postby jazz » Thu May 17, 2012 9:24 am

Hi, im new to this forum and im hoping someone maybe able to help me with some guidence.

Just recently i put my heart back out there and got it well and truly broken, most likely through my own negativity but it was such a wonderful feeling that i would like to feel it again. I have tried to put it all behind me and put myself back out there but it all seems to go pear shaped very easy. I guess i would like to know if i am ever going to learn the lessons of previous relationships and be able to find that wonderful feeling again.

Thanks for taking the time to read :)

Hi :)
R/ships arent easy they can be very confusing at times :-\ we all want to be loved well most of us do, :) so we go into a r/ship giving our best being happy for a while then it all turns sour for us, this is called a karmic learning r/ship lesson, some of us will have many as myself :-o to learn from and some will have less it just depends on how we need to learn our chosen lessons and the time in which we have chosen to learn.

I feel you are very sensitive maybe even a little insecure i could be wrong, or feel you are going to miss out on love i can tell you now you wont, sometimes we are just trying to love the wrong person there is nothing wrong with you , when a r/ship ends give your self time to reflect on that r/ship ask yourself why did i bring that person into my life ,what was i feeling at the time was i lonely, insecure, lacking confidence , was i hoping for that person to make me happy and put my life right for me? in learning lesson r/ships if we have insecurities , fears or doubts about ourselves we will usually attract a person into our lives for our learning to show us where we need to step up and deal with any personal emotional insecurity we have or we will keep attracting the same into our lives that have bigger problems or worse than us, eg. if a person knows you are insecure by your actions and the way you are with them, they will play on that and know you are relying on them for security or attention because you want to be loved... those kind of r/ships wont grow or progress they are lessons for you to have a good look at why you attract certain people into your life.

R/ships that are for our learning open us right up to our truth our higher truth of ourselves as mine did, we need to face our faults, our insecurities, our fears our doubts we have about ourselves and our lives, because no one is going to come into our lives and fix what we have to do for ourselves to give us the confidence we need to stand on our own two feet .

There is no wrong r/ship for us, the Universe sets up the perfect lessons for us that we need for our growth and for the growth of our soul, we are totally responsible for who we bring into our lives as a potential partner, friend or lover it is all for our learning, some will learn if they choose to some wont and will keep attracting negative energy into their lives because they wont admit they have faults or any insecurities.

It is hard at times to admit we have faults and not every one is to blame when something doesnt work out for us so we need to really allow a healing time after a r/ship breakup to reflect on what part we played in that r/ship and what part the other person played. it is only when we are completly honest to ourselves that we start to learn valuable wisdom about r/ships , ourselves others and of life.

I learned to give myself time to reflect on what i had experienced and felt in a r/ship, and how i felt emotionally when i brought a person into my life, we have to feel not think did i really love this person, did he really love me appreciate me and respect me love is a feeling its an emotion we need to feel and trust.
If we choose to learn we get better and better about learning about ourselves and being honest to ourselves as to where we need to take responsability in that r/ship.... it is then we start to learn the wisdom of r/ships that no one but us can know what we want and dont want in a r/ship and we learn that if we want to from our karmic learning lessons, when i learned all this over a time of 50 years yes i know i must have been so :-\ with why arent i being loved, i love and give to someone why arent i getting it back i thought there was something wrong with me :-s but it wasnt that at all i was simply trying to love the wrong person for me the penny dropped big time for me at last ;) and although i cried buckets of tears was hurt, disappointed i learned so much about myself that gave me the truth of myself, others and of life that i am so grateful for now to pass on to others :)

When ever a r/ship ends try this first of all give thanks to that person and for the lesson coming into your life, Bless it and let it go, then allow yourself to heal and take in the wisdom of that r/ship. Give yourself time alone not to be lonely but for reflection, go out with your girlfriends or guy friends sorry i dont know if you are male or female :ymblushing: have a good time and dont focus so much on r/ships, they will come in and out of our lives all the time, until we graduate from our karmic learning lessons and are ready to recieve our soul mate on a soul level of love, if that is what we are meant to have, some chose to be on their own as i do after many years of learning because i am happy to be on my own with my cat i dont need a man in my life to make me happy but thats me and what i have chosen everyone is different according to what they have chosen in their destiny.
When you meet a new person try to have that person as a friend first, dont go rushing in with your heart on your sleeve, give yourself a chance to get to know the real personality of that person and what comes from their heart you can tell and feel if a person has good energy and is sincere or not trust your gut feelings they are your soul truth the truth that seperates falseness from reality.
You will be fine try to learn what life is showing you and bringing you to learn about yourself as you are the only one who knows what you want in life, how you want to live your life and who you want to share it with if you want to share your life with a person hope that has helped you understand how r/ships work when we need to learn from karmic r/ships, the Universe sets up the right time and place when we are ready to meet that someone special on a soul level as according to what we have chosen before we come here.
Godbless :ymhug:
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Re: Life lessons

Postby Rev. Chris Roubis » Sat May 19, 2012 1:23 am

Well said Ladies ^:)^

TJP please listen to the guidance and experience here, it is priceless!

TJP things go pear shaped because you may attract the wrong kind of person... But even going out with the right person, things can still go pear shaped.

I know from all my experiences, is that once you find happiness from within, and stop looking for it from others, then things start working out much better for you.

Don't be a Woman that needs a man, be a Woman a man needs. @};-

You may subconsciously feel that finding Mr right will make you the happiest woman on the planet. The real truth is you must be happy with yourself from the start. Mr right is just the icing on the cake.
Rev. Chris Roubis named Chief Little Horn... by my guides.
(main spirit guide) Chief White Eagle, (other guides) Chief Sitting Bull, Chief Oconostota, Chief Eagle Eyes, Chief Eagle Tomahawk. Chief White Tail. Chief White Feather and more. Biblical tribes Asher, Issachar, Zebulun, Dan and Naphtal, Thessalonians, Manasseh etc... were Aegean Greek tribes.
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Re: Life lessons

Postby jazz » Sat May 19, 2012 10:57 am

Well said Ladies ^:)^

TJP please listen to the guidance and experience here, it is priceless!

TJP things go pear shaped because you may attract the wrong kind of person... But even going out with the right person, things can still go pear shaped.

I know from all my experiences, is that once you find happiness from within, and stop looking for it from others, then things start working out much better for you.

Don't be a Woman that needs a man, be a Woman a man needs. @};-

You may subconsciously feel that finding Mr right will make you the happiest woman on the planet. The real truth is you must be happy with yourself from the start. Mr right is just the icing on the cake.

Right on Chris;;) Truthseeker and I give from spirit our hearts and from some of ouf lifes experiences as you do yourself, i am soooooooo grateful for the wisdom i have now about myself, others, life and spirituality :ymhug: to be able to pass onto others so they understand better that we arent being punished when things in life dont go as planned experiences are put before us to learn from, some souls will, sadly some souls wont but it is always up to us how we use our free will and choice.

I have been so glad when the penny has finally dropped for me it set me free from so much emotional crapp i put myself through, when you can admit to your faults and we all have them, we then can see all the good qualities we have too going for us and where we have needed to change our way of thinking, our attitude towards others and ourselves, what we need to deal with about ourselves and our lives that others cant fix and how we truly want to be for ourselves in life that creates the perfect balance of all things negative and positive that we will always have come into our lives at different times to face and deal with.

Learning to love ourselves is the greatest gift we can give to ourselves and our soul, the two truly work together in harmoney when our higher self excepts the truth of ourselves, warts and all ;) its amazing how much it changes our life when things start to make sense and we know we arent being punished in any way when trials and tribulations come into our lives that are hard to deal with,painfull and disappointing it is all part of our learning experiences to help us bring in wisdom and dig deep to bring out our strengths, faith and beliefs that we also will have love, happiness and joy in our lives too :) i would say to anyone please dont be dispondent if things are tough or painfull in your life,there is always help, comfort and guidance with us all the time :ymhug: it may seem a dark time for us with what we are going through, but we will get through it in time if we allow ourselves to, and i would also say believe in your heart we are sent enough spiritual love to help any broken part of our lives our loved ones and friends also give us much love and support to help us through as much as they possibly can in some cases of grief i am afraid no words can help the one who is grieving it is a very personal pain that only that person knows.
we are all different in the way we handle grief,'
some souls sadly never release their grief for a loved one through maybe believing they will never see their loved one again and they have lost them forever and of course they want their loved one back in the physical world with them because they cannot live without them it is just too painfull you do hear of people dying of a broken heart and i believe that to be true as sad as it is.

I know losing my son was very painful for me i didnt want to live here without him with either he was a special soul and we loved each other to pieces :ymhug: but i knew he was going to be with me for only a short time in this lifetime and my chosen purpose was to experience that grief and pain so i can help those who lose a loved believe in their hearts if they choose to that we never lose our loved ones they go on ahead of us and wait for us until it is our time to see them and be with them again :ymhug: but they are around us and with us watching over us with their love, strength comfort and guidance and they are there whenever we need them, they are right beside us they know when we are thinking of them, they see our tears, disappointments, hurts and sadness, but they also see our acheivements, our success, our happiness love and joy we have in our lives, they are with us in spiritual presence at weddings, christenings, graduations, births, they know all we do and they can help us with much guidance all we need to do is talk to them as if they were with us because they are, they hear our thoughts and our words and if we give ourselves quiet time we will know they are answering us, we will feel their presence in many ways they try very hard to let us know they are with us and around us with their love :ymhug: I have my son with me as my spiritual helper as loved ones can be our spiritual helpers not guides but spiritual helpers he helps me with my work on this site with those who are grieving bless his heart and he helps all the family and watches over them he has just given my youngest grandson who is coming up 19 years age the same age i lost my son a good talking to and kick up the backside and told him to pull his head in for mixing with a crowd who are doing crack he could see the danger for his newphew and he told me of that danger too so you see how much help they are to us they do know what some people get up to and they send alot of warnings my grandson admitted he felt his presence and was being told pull your head in mate its not worth it thank God he did he is doing so well as a fully quilified brickie he has worked hard to get that trade and he works hard for his money alot of his mates are doing crack they dont work or have anything which is so sad but its their choice so now my grandson will try to help them spirit works in wonderful ways. :ymhug:
Sorry i have written a book sometimes i just feel a need to say things that might help others :) Godbless.
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Re: Life lessons

Postby TJP » Sat May 19, 2012 2:29 pm

Thankyou for taking the time to give me the guidence that i really needed O:-)

So much of what you all have told me is so true, i guess i just maybe needed to see it right in front of me to realise it. I do have insecurties that i need to deal with when i comes to relationships, i have always felt that i wasnt worthy of having someone love me, that has changed, i am worthy of having that someone special in my life, maybe the lesson i had to learn recently.

I need to look at past experiences objectively and learn from them, no good tucking the hurt away without dealing with it as it all comes back with the next relationship, another lesson learned. I am not a terrible person, yes i have my faults, but so does everyone else. The guy that is ready to share my life will accept these faults as i will theirs.
Don't be a Woman that needs a man, be a Woman a man needs.
What a great piece of advice, something i will try very hard to adhere to in the future.

O:-)

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Re: Life lessons

Postby jazz » Sat May 19, 2012 3:57 pm

Thankyou for taking the time to give me the guidence that i really needed O:-)

So much of what you all have told me is so true, i guess i just maybe needed to see it right in front of me to realise it. I do have insecurties that i need to deal with when i comes to relationships, i have always felt that i wasnt worthy of having someone love me, that has changed, i am worthy of having that someone special in my life, maybe the lesson i had to learn recently.

I need to look at past experiences objectively and learn from them, no good tucking the hurt away without dealing with it as it all comes back with the next relationship, another lesson learned. I am not a terrible person, yes i have my faults, but so does everyone else. The guy that is ready to share my life will accept these faults as i will theirs.
Don't be a Woman that needs a man, be a Woman a man needs.
What a great piece of advice, something i will try very hard to adhere to in the future.

O:-)

Hi Tjp :) that was actually Chris's quote its good isnt it ;) you will be okay we all have lessons to learn here on this earth plane as individuals no one's lessons are the same we each have our own way and time in learning and with the necessary experiences that come into our lives not one soul goes without life's lessons some souls will learn some will not it just depends on what we have chosen to experience in each lifetime we have here.
We all have tears :( grief, hurt, disappointments, and feel totally lost at times, then along comes an experience that will lift us above that where we will have happiness :D luuurrrvvv :x ;;) joy :ymparty: success acheivments :-bd find religion or spirituality O:-) have a lovely pet :o3 to love and love us back and bring us joy :) all these sorts of emotions go hand in hand its finding the balance that is the key so one negative issue doesnt overtake everything else in our lives.
Take care and Godbless. :ymhug:
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Blessings jazz :)

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Re: Life lessons

Postby Truthseeker » Sat May 19, 2012 5:43 pm

Hi TJP,
Glad you have figured it out :)

Jazz - always a pleasure to read your replies.

And Chris, regarding the quote: Don't be a Woman that needs a man, be a Woman a man needs.

Ok now I have to add my own bit regarding this, yes I agree that this quote should be stated to a needy woman who over relies on a man for her own happiness but I have to add my own bit regarding this cause sometimes men can be over needy too and if I was homosexual that would offend me :)) I'll explain why:

I personally think it works both ways, it doesn't matter whether your male or female. I personally admire men who do not rely on women for their insecure needs. A real woman does not want a pussy who expects to be mothered like a child, how can you ever actually admire him as a real man? Eventually when you do grow from a young girl into a real woman it starts to get tiring and you lose all respect for that person who expects you to to take on the role that his mummy left to you. It's all sweet and innocent in the beginning to have a man who totally relies on you as you feel extremely needed and wanted (something insecure people feel and I was one of them once upon a time) and that's where people fall into the trap of trying to get a need from another person that they find hard to fullfill on their own as their own person in their own right. After a while when one person starts to leech onto another and yes I used the word “leech” cause that's what it starts to feel like when the more independent one out of the pair starts to feel smothered, I really admire people who do everything on their own and not wait for another person to spoon feed them, I don't mean that literally, just a bit of sarcasm, lol.

I have other family members and friends who are in similar situations, they totally rely on their partners for their own happiness, sometimes certain cultures cause this too. I have a friend who used to come to me every single day telling me that her husband comes home late every single night and throws himself into his high profile career, for years and years she was always relying on him for her own happiness and was so obsessed by him, she never seemed to get it that he was actually running away from her because she was smothering him all the time.

People have to try and understand that when they are in a relationship they have to do their own thing too, like have your own hobbies/interests/going out with your friends etc, don't just focus on your partner!! You have to be secure enough to set that person free and if you are really secure within yourself you will have faith that things will go well, insecure people latch onto their partners in fear of losing them and that's what ends up ruining the relationship in the end. People who smother others need to get a life of their own and not rely on others for their own insecure needs and it only gets harder when children come into it as you do not want them to follow the same behaviours/patterns so you have to always show them that you are secure enough within yourself not only for their own wellbeing and future but for your own self respect.

My ideal man is Archangel Michael, yeh I know totally impossible and probably blasphemous in the eyes of the church :)) :)) :)) =))

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Re: Life lessons

Postby jazz » Sun May 20, 2012 7:39 pm

Hi TJP,
Glad you have figured it out :)

Jazz - always a pleasure to read your replies.

And Chris, regarding the quote: Don't be a Woman that needs a man, be a Woman a man needs.

Ok now I have to add my own bit regarding this, yes I agree that this quote should be stated to a needy woman who over relies on a man for her own happiness but I have to add my own bit regarding this cause sometimes men can be over needy too and if I was homosexual that would offend me :)) I'll explain why:

I personally think it works both ways, it doesn't matter whether your male or female. I personally admire men who do not rely on women for their insecure needs. A real woman does not want a pussy who expects to be mothered like a child, how can you ever actually admire him as a real man? Eventually when you do grow from a young girl into a real woman it starts to get tiring and you lose all respect for that person who expects you to to take on the role that his mummy left to you. It's all sweet and innocent in the beginning to have a man who totally relies on you as you feel extremely needed and wanted (something insecure people feel and I was one of them once upon a time) and that's where people fall into the trap of trying to get a need from another person that they find hard to fullfill on their own as their own person in their own right. After a while when one person starts to leech onto another and yes I used the word “leech” cause that's what it starts to feel like when the more independent one out of the pair starts to feel smothered, and that's what I went through, I started to feel smothered by my partner and that's why I really admire people who do everything on their own and not wait for another person to spoon feed them, I don't mean that literally, just a bit of sarcasm, lol.

I have other family members and friends who are in similar situations, they totally rely on their partners for their own happiness, sometimes certain cultures cause this too. I have a friend who used to come to me every single day telling me that her husband comes home late every single night and throws himself into his high profile career, for years and years she was always relying on him for her own happiness and was so obsessed by him, she never seemed to get it that he was actually running away from her because she was smothering him all the time.

People have to try and understand that when they are in a relationship they have to do their own thing too, like have your own hobbies/interests/going out with your friends etc, don't just focus on your partner!! You have to be secure enough to set that person free and if you are really secure within yourself you will have faith that things will go well, insecure people latch onto their partners in fear of losing them and that's what ends up ruining the relationship in the end. People who smother others need to get a life of their own and not rely on others for their own insecure needs and it only gets harder when children come into it as you do not want them to follow the same behaviours/patterns so you have to always show them that you are secure enough within yourself not only for their own wellbeing and future but for your own self respect.

My ideal man is Archangel Michael, yeh I know totally impossible and probably blasphemous in the eyes of the church :)) :)) :)) =))

Hey Truthseeker :) back at you with the compliment with your replies and yes i agree you about Archangel Micheal being the perfect man we would have to share okay :))
I continue to do free of charge, a one question reading. For a more detailed paid reading you can, Send Private Message by clicking on my name.
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Re: Life lessons

Postby Truthseeker » Sun May 20, 2012 8:10 pm

Hi Jazz,

Yes, we can only dream :x

Gosh we are so cheeky, hmm I don't think Archangel Michael will take us too seriously, I'm certain he already has a long league of female admirers ;) This morning I said a prayer to the Divine and I called upon Archangel Michael, I asked him not to take me so seriously for my cheekiness, he knows me inside out anyway and if anything I'm sure he is flattered and he knows I mean well. :D O:-)

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Re: Life lessons

Postby jazz » Mon May 21, 2012 10:20 am

Hi Jazz,

Yes, we can only dream :x

Gosh we are so cheeky, hmm I don't think Archangel Michael will take us too seriously, I'm certain he already has a long league of female admirers ;) This morning I said a prayer to the Divine and I called upon Archangel Michael, I asked him not to take me so seriously for my cheekiness, he knows me inside out anyway and if anything I'm sure he is flattered and he knows I mean well. :D O:-)
Hahaha i know, i should know better at my age :ymblushing: but yes we can dream cant we i said to him you know you are a hunk dont you ;;) and maybe in another lifetime i will meet someone with all his qualities only human :D so i actally know what it is like to have a sincer decent man in my life to love me and appreciate me just like my Mum had in my Dad and with each other bless them :ymhug: xxxx
I continue to do free of charge, a one question reading. For a more detailed paid reading you can, Send Private Message by clicking on my name.
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