Hi there Chris or Jazz,
I was wondering if any of you could pick up on what I believe could have been a childhood spirit guide of mine. I've been thinking of her now and then and even though sometimes I think it could just have been my childhood imagination in overdrive and any psychologist would laugh and say most kids have make believe friends but I always wondered. Well anyway when I was about 6 or 7 I had an invisible friend called "Maria", she was like my twin, she totally understood me and we would play together every day, I would talk to her like she was actually there, full on conversations. Was she actually a real spirit? Or was it just my childhood imagination as I stated before? I could have sworn once when I woke up in the middle of the night I saw a presence of a 7 year old girl next to me, it was like static electricity and then it disappeared.
Reason why I was thinking of this was because I'm keen to find out about my spirit guides, I haven't really had one that has actually stood out other than my animal spirit guide and my angels, I know I've had ancestors as my guides but I'd like to know if there are others cause I'm just not feeling them at the moment. Sometimes before I go to sleep I ask my guides to come forward and usually I dream of people I don't know at all or I don't remember them when I wake up, perhaps I'll keep meditating. I guess I just want to know if there is a person as my guide who once walked the earth, someone who is not my ancestor, someone neutral.
Since I've been giving readings on this website I can pick things up about total strangers whom I have never met before but trying to pick things up about myself for some reason I just don't seem to get anything. May be someone else can pick something up for me, I'd really appreciate it, it's a little frustrating at times not being able to pick things up for yourself.
Jazz you are a special gem, God bless you, thank you so much for your fast reply, after reading what you told me my eyes welled up with a flood of tears cause that simply explains why I used to feel like a piece was missing in my life since I was a child. I believe what you are saying is true. Sometimes when I feel I will write a very long post I usually type it out first and then copy it into this website. Well before reading your post this is what I wrote before pasting it onto this website.:
After writing this last post I decided before I went to sleep to say a small prayer to the Divine and asked him to send all his spirit guides from the light that are with me to show themselves to me. I tried to focus on my spirit guides and fell asleep in doing so, well it happened and I believe it was real, one very special spirit guide came to me and she was childlike, her name is Ella. Ella also told me her second name but when I woke up I totally forgot her second name, I kept trying to remember it but it just disappeared, it did frustrate me not being able to remember her second name.
In my dream I thought I was still awake in bed trying to fall asleep and then Ella came to me and started to tuck me in, I started to feel her hands on top of my blankets comforting me and then I felt like a little butterfly kiss on top of my ear, it was so sweet and her touch was like a healing touch, I was a little afraid because I thought I was still awake (even though I was actually dreaming) but then I started to talk to her and I thanked her so much for making herself known to me and that I wanted to show my love back so I kissed my fingers to relay my kiss back on her cheek even though I couldn't see her cause the blankets were on top of me, I could just feel her childlike presence, when I put my fingers out to plant that kiss back on her cheek I felt her little lips kiss my fingers too. The feeling was so full of unconditional love. Then I wanted to look at her to see her even though I was still a little afraid (I guess it was the shock) and I pulled the blankets off my head I saw my deceased father in the room and the light was on, he was carrying a rifle over his back and my mother was beside him (I'm not sure why he was carrying a rifle) but then I asked my dad if he could turn the light off because I forgot to and he said to my mother something like “these kids always forget to turn the lights off!” then I noticed Ella beside my bed and she was a small young girl, I think she had pale features and bright eyes with lots of long hair. I remember thinking to myself at that point after seeing my Dad that no one would believe me that he was resurrected and then the dream ended.
Well I do remember Ella answering my questions but my questions were mainly an introduction, me asking her whether she was actually Maria who was with me as a child, I'm not sure whether she told me that was her or not (I can't remember). I'd like to find out now whether Ella was someone from my past life, or is she just a little spirit there for a reason. Her love though sure was comforting and healing, it was just beautiful, just a little taste from the light.
Thank you so much Jazz, Ella may just be my twin who was there as my childhood friend Maria. Her touch was so real in the dream, I'm sure it was actually happening while I was asleep. It is so comforting to know that she is real and she is there. It's weird because the thought did cross my mind, I felt like somehow I did have a twin in one lifetime or another cause I always felt like something was missing and I used to feel alone even around family. I was told by a psychic that my twin flame is coming but I thought of the twin flame as being male in nature but may be it doesn't have to be, may be the twin flame can actually be your twin brother/sister from your past life.
What a breakthrough!!!!!
Go on Chris cry, let your feminine side flow.......Awww you guys are gonna make me cry dammit.
Awww you guys are gonna make me cry dammit.
Hi there Jazz,
I was hoping if you could shed a bit more on this, I need confirmation as to whether this is correct as I am not 100% sure as to whether what I was getting was real or was it my own thoughts adding to it, anyway I asked Ella to come forward again to give me more info into my past life with her.
I asked her how she died and she said a shooting accident. Apparently my father in my past life did it by accident and I feel somehow he was wrongly accused for her murder. I feel he was into hunting or something of that nature.
I asked her where we lived and I got London. I also saw an english style cottage with flowers and I saw teapots. I also got an image of a girl in a holly hobby style outfit, may be it was a sign of what they wore in that era. I also thought of holly hobby.
I asked if we had any other siblings if in fact any of them were in this lifetime with me and I got a yes, a brother. I felt from my own feelings that when Ella died I clung to him because he was the only one I trusted as far as a male figure is concerned and I feel he had to hold the fort after my father was taken away. I feel that in that life I had trust issues with men after that, I compared a lot of them to my brother.
I feel that after when I grew up I think and I'm not sure but I believe it's a strong possibility that I may have moved to France. I feel that I worked in some sort of creative arts type industry and that I still carried a lot of anxiety from childhood. I feel that I was also murdered there too. Now since I was a small child I have always had a love for France and I now collect all decorative things french. But on the other hand I also have a phobia with some french songs/some french cabaret and waiters if that makes any sense at all, I know it sounds weird, at the same time I love it and at the same time I'm scared of some of it!!
When I was at school I loved studying french and I came first, and went on to study it further, even though now I don't remember many words, getting old ha ha!!
I was a bit hesitant posting all this but I feel I have to as I want to know if in fact what I did get was real or not. I'm trying not to doubt myself but it's different when you dig for yourself as to when you do a reading for others.
Hope you get anything as confirmation, it would really help.
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