I agree a lot of confusion, and pain.
Allow yourself something other than a married man nothing will come of it, and if you were to ask him I feel you wouldn't get any straight answers.
If we are unhappy and fulfilled after years of trying to make things work, but it isn't then be kind to yourself, your partner and allow each other to go on your separate ways.
It is always hard when children are involved everyone is hurt from a r/ship break up, if we can remain friends if the situation can, then it is healthy for the kids to have both Mum and Dad there for them as they are growing up.
We create negative energy when a situation is unhappy in our lives and that fills the house up with that energy, until we leave or change that situation and create a more positive energy for ourselves, filling any new place we are in with that new energy...
Each new step we take, when we know it is the right thing to do brings us to a better kind of happiness for our well being.
Always ask and bring in your Angels for help, they are only too happy to help us in any way they can, they will send us strong messages through our feelings, thoughts, dreams, signs what ever they know will be best for us to recognise as help and guidance
take notice of any dreams you remember, take notice of any signs that bring you inner peace of give you a sense of yes I know I am doing the right thing for my highest of good .
send you partner love, let him know in your thoughts you wish him well in life and thank him for all the good times you shared together give thanks for any beautiful children you have together, although some r/ships, marriages do not work we still have the children we are meant to have with that person, bless the marriage you had, bless the person you married then release that to God with your love, then allow yourself time to heal, forgive and move on into the future with positive feelings, letting go in a positive way allows us to then receive all that we are deserving of including your partner as we all deserve to be love in the way we were meant to be loved
You will be fine, things happen for a reason in our lives, and we can only do the best we can at any time, happiness begins with us, love yourself more and love comes in from that energy, love finds us when we are in a positive energy not a stressed energy, love is an energy, you are yet to meet your soul mate and that happens in Divine timing focus on what brings you the most happiness, find new things to do, spend time with the kids, meet new friends and have some fun don't focus on romance so much that will be taken care of you are fragile at the moment so don't rush into anything that you feel isn't right for you just know that you are going to be looked after and there is much happiness waiting up ahead for you.