Please could I have a reading..? **UPDATE**

[shopgirl]

I am sorry if this comes through twice but my first post seems to have disappeared .

Firstly hi to everyone and once again I just want to say thank you in advance for anyone who is able to give advice.

I have a situation with my marriage, I have written before to ask for advice, however I am now faced with a huge decision yet can't make a decision. My marriage situation involves step-children an expat posting and alcoholism.

My husband is an alcoholic, he is also a shift worker and is home more than he is at work. Whenever he is at home he is either drunk or on his way to getting drunk. He drinks a carton a day of large cans of beer, not the standard size. He is usually wrecked by lunchtime, but always drunk by the time I get home at 4.30pm. He is not a happy drunk but and an angry seething maniac. He is prone to exploding in anger over anything small and we (my children and I) spend most evenings trying to appease him to avoid the arguments and shouting that usually eventuate.

I am exhausted. I love him, I don't want my marriage to end because before the days of being an alcoholic he was my best friend but, at the same time I don't want to raise my children in this insanity. They are beautiful people that simply deserve better.

I love my life in Dubai, we have pets that possibly could not all move with us (a big one for me because I can't come to terms with leaving them behind, they would stay in our home but they wouldn't have the attention or love that they are used to) my friends are there, hobbies and work - all of which I don't want to leave.

I am in Oz visiting family at the moment and contemplating returning here so the children can finish their schooling and have some kind of peaceful home life. But at the same time I don't want to end my marriage, I would like to think I could commute between Dubai and Oz. I also don't want my husband to feel that I abandoned him but being together in Dubai seems to be ruining our marriage.


What should I do? Is there any chance that hubby will overcome his alcoholism and if not will it affect his career (I keep getting a strong feeling that it will, but that could just be my own paranoia). What would be the outcome if we stayed in Dubai compared to relocating back to Oz? I could really use a bit more guidance, I feel trapped in indecision.

Thank you
Shopgirl. X

[jazz]

I am sorry if this comes through twice but my first post seems to have disappeared .

Firstly hi to everyone and once again I just want to say thank you in advance for anyone who is able to give advice.

I have a situation with my marriage, I have written before to ask for advice, however I am now faced with a huge decision yet can't make a decision. My marriage situation involves step-children an expat posting and alcoholism.

My husband is an alcoholic, he is also a shift worker and is home more than he is at work. Whenever he is at home he is either drunk or on his way to getting drunk. He drinks a carton a day of large cans of beer, not the standard size. He is usually wrecked by lunchtime, but always drunk by the time I get home at 4.30pm. He is not a happy drunk but and an angry seething maniac. He is prone to exploding in anger over anything small and we (my children and I) spend most evenings trying to appease him to avoid the arguments and shouting that usually eventuate.

I am exhausted. I love him, I don't want my marriage to end because before the days of being an alcoholic he was my best friend but, at the same time I don't want to raise my children in this insanity. They are beautiful people that simply deserve better.

I love my life in Dubai, we have pets that possibly could not all move with us (a big one for me because I can't come to terms with leaving them behind, they would stay in our home but they wouldn't have the attention or love that they are used to) my friends are there, hobbies and work - all of which I don't want to leave.

I am in Oz visiting family at the moment and contemplating returning here so the children can finish their schooling and have some kind of peaceful home life. But at the same time I don't want to end my marriage, I would like to think I could commute between Dubai and Oz. I also don't want my husband to feel that I abandoned him but being together in Dubai seems to be ruining our marriage.


What should I do? Is there any chance that hubby will overcome his alcoholism and if not will it affect his career (I keep getting a strong feeling that it will, but that could just be my own paranoia). What would be the outcome if we stayed in Dubai compared to relocating back to Oz? I could really use a bit more guidance, I feel trapped in indecision.

Thank you
Shopgirl. X

Hi shopgirl, I will get back to you okay with this jazz

[jazz]

I am sorry if this comes through twice but my first post seems to have disappeared .

Firstly hi to everyone and once again I just want to say thank you in advance for anyone who is able to give advice.

I have a situation with my marriage, I have written before to ask for advice, however I am now faced with a huge decision yet can't make a decision. My marriage situation involves step-children an expat posting and alcoholism.

My husband is an alcoholic, he is also a shift worker and is home more than he is at work. Whenever he is at home he is either drunk or on his way to getting drunk. He drinks a carton a day of large cans of beer, not the standard size. He is usually wrecked by lunchtime, but always drunk by the time I get home at 4.30pm. He is not a happy drunk but and an angry seething maniac. He is prone to exploding in anger over anything small and we (my children and I) spend most evenings trying to appease him to avoid the arguments and shouting that usually eventuate.

I am exhausted. I love him, I don't want my marriage to end because before the days of being an alcoholic he was my best friend but, at the same time I don't want to raise my children in this insanity. They are beautiful people that simply deserve better.

I love my life in Dubai, we have pets that possibly could not all move with us (a big one for me because I can't come to terms with leaving them behind, they would stay in our home but they wouldn't have the attention or love that they are used to) my friends are there, hobbies and work - all of which I don't want to leave.

I am in Oz visiting family at the moment and contemplating returning here so the children can finish their schooling and have some kind of peaceful home life. But at the same time I don't want to end my marriage, I would like to think I could commute between Dubai and Oz. I also don't want my husband to feel that I abandoned him but being together in Dubai seems to be ruining our marriage.


What should I do? Is there any chance that hubby will overcome his alcoholism and if not will it affect his career (I keep getting a strong feeling that it will, but that could just be my own paranoia). What would be the outcome if we stayed in Dubai compared to relocating back to Oz? I could really use a bit more guidance, I feel trapped in indecision.

Thank you
Shopgirl. X

HI shopgirl,
You may not like what I have to say, having living with a drunk and violent husband myself, the first thing I did when I could see he wasn't going to change was to get the hell out of there with my children, you should not expose your children to this at all they deserve a safe, secure home to be in even if that is just with you, and you need to be strong for yourself and do yourself a favour and get out of that situation, that is not a real man caring and loving you or his children it is a man who wants to drink, you cant change him if he doesn't want to change, and he wont help himself if he still wants to drink I know that only too well.

Your kids shouldn't be in that situation neither should you, that kind of insecure feeling your kids have can do a lot of damage to them for later on in life.

If he was keen to change and get professional help to be a better person for himself and for you and the kids then allow yourself to have the house and he move out until you see he has got the help he needs and his off the drink before you live with him again other wise you will go back to the same thing and that's not fair or right to do that to yourself or the kids.

Some times we can think we love someone and put up with any behaviour even although we are unhappy and live a miserable life for ourselves but we are not living to our true happiness or truth of how we really feel, usually through our insecurities, fears of low self esteem.
A person can say anything to you, or what you want to hear, and stay the same keeping you in a false belief that they really want to change but don't make the effort to do anything to help themselves.
YOu are the only one who can decide what you want to do in this situation if he wants to get help he will and that will be because he respects himself and wants to change because he loves you and the children if he doesn't there's the your answer I lost all respect for my first husband, because he thought more of his drinking and other women than me and my kids so I did the best thing for us all and got out and never looked back he has been married 3 times now still doing the same to the women in his life???

Jazz.

[Rev. Chris Roubis]

Jazz

he will never change, because you allow him to be like that..

Find your heart that you once gave him on a silver platter. Also find your power that you handed over to him.

[shopgirl]

Thank you Jazz for your reply and for sharing your personal experience.

I have been contemplating leaving for the past two years, however before taking that step I wanted to make sure I did everything I could to help him, including being patient and understanding - and of course there is always that hope that somewhere underneath all that drinking is the person that I once considered my best friend.

Jazz could you please give me an insight into the following worries? I am so so worried about the money aspect of going out on my own. As I am moving countries I will need to find a job, a house and rental is so expensive. There is a particular school that I would like the children to go to, do you think that will happen? Any insight into securing a job and house would be very much appreciated.

Thank you again
Shopgirl

[shopgirl]

Jazz

he will never change, because you allow him to be like that..

Find your heart that you once gave him on a silver platter. Also find your power that you handed over to him.

Hi Chris

Thanks for your reply. I have a sincere question, how do I allow him to be like that and what can I do differently?

Thanks again
SHOPGIRL

[Rev. Chris Roubis]

how do I allow him to be like that and what can I do differently?

You have been far too tolerant with him.. start acting like a school teacher. If he misbehaves... discipline him.

There are plenty of support groups for woman trying to leave their abusive husbands.. (abuse can be mentally or physically) They will also help with accommodation.

have a read of these links

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/domesti ... ffects.htm

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle ... ve-husband

http://www.domestic-violence-help.org/abused-wives.html

http://www.womenshealth.gov/violence-ag ... lence.html

[jazz]

Thank you Jazz for your reply and for sharing your personal experience.

I have been contemplating leaving for the past two years, however before taking that step I wanted to make sure I did everything I could to help him, including being patient and understanding - and of course there is always that hope that somewhere underneath all that drinking is the person that I once considered my best friend.

Jazz could you please give me an insight into the following worries? I am so so worried about the money aspect of going out on my own. As I am moving countries I will need to find a job, a house and rental is so expensive. There is a particular school that I would like the children to go to, do you think that will happen? Any insight into securing a job and house would be very much appreciated.

Thank you again
Shopgirl

Hi shopgirl,
My Angels came through and said you will be looked after, regardless of any struggles you may have and we do have struggles in life before we settle in a more secure way of life after coming from a bad situation into a better one.
Trust that what you need to do for yourself and your family will all turn out for the best for you
We cannot help the people we love, it has to come from them that they want to help themselves and I don't feel
your partner is ready or wants to help himself and stop drinking the first and most important people in his life should be you and your children not drink??
The Angels are asking you to give them your feelings of heaviness, guilt, anger, blame that may shroud your loving outlook.
Enjoy the peace in your heart once more

Be strong and trust in God and the Angels there is a much better life waiting up ahead for you and your children you will be alright have faith and keep that faith.

[shopgirl]

I will be forever grateful to you Chris and Jazz. I have read the information provided in the links and sadly was able to relate/identify to the behaviours and patterns of abuse mentioned.

Jazz thank you for the reading, you hit the nail on the head!

It is very generous and kind of you to give your time to help others. Thank you for helping me with this situation, I will give you an update once I am on my feet!

[jazz]

I will be forever grateful to you Chris and Jazz. I have read the information provided in the links and sadly was able to relate/identify to the behaviours and patterns of abuse mentioned.

Jazz thank you for the reading, you hit the nail on the head!

It is very generous and kind of you to give your time to help others. Thank you for helping me with this situation, I will give you an update once I am on my feet!

Hi shopgirl,
You are welcome for any help offered, we like a happy ending for those concerned, life is too short hoping and waiting for things to change, when they shouldn't be like that in the first place when you are a family
you need to feel like a family not be afraid of how your partner is going to come home after drinking and how he is going to be towards you that is not a happy situation for anyone to be in you all deserve better and you shall have it just keep the faith that God has a bigger plan for us take care jazz.

[Rev. Chris Roubis]

You are welcome for any help offered, we like a happy ending for those concerned, life is too short hoping and waiting for things to change, when they shouldn't be like that in the first place when you are a family
you need to feel like a family not be afraid of how your partner is going to come home after drinking and how he is going to be towards you that is not a happy situation for anyone to be in you all deserve better and you shall have it just keep the faith that God has a bigger plan for us take care jazz.

Amen to that Jazz.

Shopgirl get on the internet or phone directory pages and start looking for support groups in your area to contact and talk to.

As Jazz said earlier.. do not be afraid!.... because you will be looked after by a higher source above.
Remember that as you let go of bad things that do not work out, you allow for more good to replace it.

[shopgirl]

Dear Chris and Jazz

It has been almost four years since I reached out to you for help and guidance. I wanted to give you an update on my current situation and confirm how right you both were with the advice you gave.

At the time of writing I was living in Dubai with my three children and my dogs. Our home life was horrific and not soon after my original letter to you my husband flipped out and tried to strangle me. He pinned me up against the wall by my neck, my son who was only 14 had to kick him to get him to let go. It was at that moment I knew I had to leave him.

From the moment I made the decision to leave we experienced absolute divine intervention. Miraculously the company my husband worked for paid for all of my belongings, including furniture to be shipped to Australia (something they have never done before and never done since). This left enough money to be able to bring my dogs with me. We have been back in Oz for two and a half years and the children have settled in well.

My husband has continued to be part of our lives, but in a most destructive way. I have finally decided to divorce him and move on with my life. I always held onto the hope that he would do the work required and change, but it seems to me that he is very happy remaining in the abusive behaviour cycle.

I also took your advice and found a counsellor who specialises in victims (or survivors) of domestic violence. It has been empowering to have this support.

So the advice your angels gave you was completely accurate. We have been divinely supported and I feel humbled and very grateful to have received as much as I have.

As I move forward with the divorce, is there any advice you can give me concerning my future? Sometimes I feel panicked about going it alone. Although rationally I know life will potentially be so much better.

I want to thank you again, your service made a huge difference to my life for which I will ever be thankful.

Warm regards
Shopgirl

[shopgirl]

Jazz - after reading other posts on this forum I have learnt that you now charge for readings and I would happily pay for a reading.

[jazz]

Yes I do charge now for readings as I need to pay bills like most other ordinary people that aren't rolling in money (still trying to win lotto lol)
I charge $10 for a one question answer and do a card spread for you or $40 for a more detailed reading you can choose which one you need the most and can private message me and I will give you any details of payment once the payment has reached my bank I start immediately on your reading.
I hope you are doing okay and I am glad that any help chris and I gave to you has helped I have been through this situation myself so I know what it is like to be going through such a difficult time with children but it is important that you do for you what is right and the children now he is big enough and old enough to get the help he needs if he ever wants to change being violent to you is a big no no there is no excuse for a man to physically harm a woman who generally cant fight back or defend herself against such an action of any sort of physical abuse .

Blessings jazz.

[Rev. Chris Roubis]

Wonderful news shopgirl

As you can see for yourself your angels and guides have your back.

Jazz's readings are amazing, you won't regret it.

I myself pulled 3 cards for you.

1. DECEIT

There is some deception going on in your life. The person hiding behind the curtain is likely someone you know or deal with either personally or professionally.
The duplicity could be regarding a personal issue, like someone spreading rumours or disrespecting you to others. Or it could be a business matter where details are hidden or even manipulated.
Be aware of what is going on in your life, and make sure you have all the information you need to keep things honest and secure.
A deeper layer of meaning may be that the deception is actually coming from within. Is there something that you’re lying to yourself about?
Whether it’s about your life or yourself, remember that the universe has a hard time sending you honouring experiences if your energy is shrouded in self-deceit.


2. BLOSSOMING ABUNDANCE

An Abundant harvest and great blessings are waiting for you, and you will find all your wishes fulfilled. You know you have done important work and it is about to pay off.
The seeds you’ve planted in your energy and in your life are ready to be harvested. Get ready for a great feast of abundant value is being prepared for you now, and spirit is applauding all of your effort.
There are energetic signals of a new increase in wealth. Be aware that you sow the seeds of your own wealth and prosperity, much like a gardener works the ground and begins to see blooming results take hold.
The universe is blessing you and helping the fruits of you labour to blossom. So smell the flowers and tend to the new growth… be grateful and enjoy.

3. THE GARDEN AND THE GATE

There are personal and financial pleasures coming your way at this time. But be aware, the choice to stay in your comfort zone may actually be motivated by habit or by fear of the unknown.
You may not be giving your spirit freedom to roam. While it’s fine to amass a great deal of wealth, don’t let it keep you from your karmic path or from living your truth.
You have the choice to shift your focus, widen your spiritual perspective, and gain the world, that is just outside your gate.

[jazz]

Great cards Chris,
When we leave anything that is not serving our higher purpose we can only gain what does serve our higher purpose, it does take courage to leave what isn't right, healthy or happy for us and we will have fears of all kinds but we need to trust that we are always looked after by a higher source of help (our heavenly Angels, our spirit guides and God.
When we can allow ourselves to trust and have faith in our future and we make wiser choices for ourselves from our past experiences the World is open to us to achieve amazing things we can have a better life, we can be stable and financially better off, we can be loved again in the right way in Divine timing when we are ready to meet our soul mate on that level of love.
It is all about trusting and keeping the faith then that faith is rewarded and we see why certain things had to happen for us to bring us to a better life and future, everything happens for a reason and our lives work out perfectly according to what we have chosen.
We have so much unseen help with us working behind the scenes helping us, guiding us and comforting us we need to tap into those higher beings and ask for help our Angels want us to ask for their help once we do they start to work on helping us to bring us to a positive outcome and to help us get on top and stay positive if we fall down and give up then we lose all faith its how we get up from any falls that shows us we can get through anything that may be thrown at us or put in our path.

Thankyou Chris for your kind comment about my readings I do my best with my spiritual help to bring hope to those who are going through a difficult emotional time your the same you do your best to reassure those not to give up and to keep the faith.

Blessings Jazz.

[shopgirl]

Thank you Jazz I will PM you

Chris thank you for doing a reading, I can expound on the 'deceit' - my ex-husband is two faced and for many years he would speak very badly about me behind my back to both friends and colleagues. Subsequently many times these friends and colleagues were incredibly unkind towards me having been persuaded to believe I was deserving of it. It was only when a friend called him out on his behaviour that I became aware of what was going on. He is also not being honest with himself or others as to why the marriage ended. Furthermore I have also discovered that from the time we met most of what he told me about himself was not true - from his performance at school to his personal achievements, financial status, upbringing ... all of it was made up.

The other two cards carry much hope and encouragement for the children and me, again thank you.

[jazz]

Great cards for shopgirl Chris we all need that hope, faith and encouragement to move forward fearlessly to better, happier and more positive outcomes for ourselves and our kids.

Blessings to you Chris...
jazz.

[Rev. Chris Roubis]

Bless you both

just wait when Jazz reads for you shopgirl... you will be blown away

[shopgirl]

Hi Chris

You are correct, Jazz's reading was phenomenal and so much more than I ever anticipated. What a beautiful woman she is and I feel very blessed that our paths crossed, she has been an incredible source of wisdom and hope.

I also want to add that Jazz picked up on something that no one else has been able to. It was the key piece of information that I needed in order to let go and fully understand my situation. There really are no words that can express my gratitude. Thank you to both of you and I wish you both an abundance of blessings.

[jazz]

God bless you Chris and Shopgirl I give so much thanks to my Spirit Guides, Angels and my son who is my spiritual helper they are truly amazing with all the help they bring through I can not take any credit for my readings it is all done through my heavenly help I am just the tea pot that pours out all the love, wisdom, truth, healing , strength, comfort and guidance they give out to those in need.

Blessings jazz.